Till the End
by KelleBelle1981
Summary: Starts where Not Fade Away ended. The war has started, but how will it end? How much will it really take if they want to win? How I saw it happening. Told from Cordy's POV.


**Till the End**

_By Kelley_

**A/N: **Okay, the end of _Angel_ left me screaming. Really screaming. First of all, Wesley's death was so horribly sad. Then to just end the series like that! Grrr…Argh.

**Summary:** Everyone has an idea of how Angel and Company fared. This is an idea that began playing around in my head after thinking about it all night. It's a first person P.O.V.

Please read and review. No flames though. That's just mean.

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So, this is what it had come down to? All these years of helping the helpless, and now they look like they need all the help they can get. Unfortunately, the odds to not appear to be in their favor, and I wish more than anything I could be there just to help them. Angel has waged a war against the most powerful demons in every dimension. And I can't be there to fight alongside them.

All I can do is watch.

Wesley. Poor Wesley. Despite what he'd told Illyria, he'd been on the road to self-destruction since Fred's untimely death.

I can't say I really liked Illyria too much…at first. I think she's one of those creatures that has to grow on you. Her lack of concern for those around her, her endless sense of superiority, and we were wondering how long it would be before the demon goddess destroyed all of them. She was above humans, and dared never treat them as an equal. Human emotions were for the weak, and were a major cause of disadvantage.

Even I was amazed when it appeared she was going to join our side. And then another unfortunate event occurred. Her powers were stripped away from her, rendering her weaker than she had ever been used to. Admitting to feeling helpless, not quite her style. And she definitely did not forget to act as though she was still above everyone.

Wesley agreed to guide her, to teach her the ways of life in a world now controlled by those she once considered the greatest scum of all. I can't say his ultimate reason for his decision. Maybe a lot of it has to do with her constant resemblance to Fred and the reminder that she was once a part of his life, even though it was for a brief and precious moment of time. But he had loved her from the beginning.

For everyone I've ever known, I've never met someone so capable of getting back on that proverbial horse after being knocked off, injured, and nearly killed so many times…except maybe for Xander. He was always a brave little toaster too. He still is.

For all it's worth, Wesley's death was hard on all of them. Angel, who had become friends with him years back could in no way have prepared for the death of yet another person so dear to his unbeating heart.

Gunn, he'd taken almost as hard. He and Wesley had been through a lot as well, and Wesley was not supposed to go like that.

Spike, well there was something about Wes that Spike found interesting. Despite the times he could make fun or annoy the poor guy, everyone suspected Spike grew fond of the guy at some point.

Illyria. She amazed me more than anyone else. She was there when Wesley died. She reverted to Fred's form so Wesley could spend his last moments on Earth with the woman he loved so passionately. Fred held Wes in her arms, told him everything would be okay, and she cried. She cried. And after it was over, she stood up and made the bastard's head explode for killing the one human she really trusted. Illyria had cried, not Fred. It was Illyria. Something in her, perhaps something she had learned from spending time with Wesley, had started picking up these emotions. I don't think she was entirely sure how to handle them herself, but she definitely and greatly cared for the one human who chose to help her.

There is a point to my rambling that I'm getting to very soon.

I watched Angel square up against the demons, swinging his axe. Not surprisingly, he beheaded the entire first line before the rest even had a chance to get into the mix. On some greater level, I believe they were fighting for Wesley as well as Fred.

Spike ran up next to Angel, taking on the demons along with him. Illyria followed in quickly, punching the demon in front of her with such force, she knocked several demons behind on their asses.

Gunn, coming in last, took his weapon, and using every bit of energy he could muster, chopped the heads off several demons in a few quick swipes. Gunn, he was always so brave, and so strong. Unfortunately, his strength was unable to help him this time. The wound to his stomach was becoming worse moment by fleeting moment, and he knew his time was almost up. Still, he was a soldier on a mission, and giving up was his last priority. He would fight until it killed him.

I watched with immense worry upon seeing Spike and Angel tossed backwards into the fence at the same time. Illyria was still going strong in her fight, but that left Gunn more defenseless. And he did amazingly well despite the injury that was obviously causing him terrible pain.

Almost immediately Spike and Angel were back in the fight, full force. They had some pretty gross looking cuts, but they were vampires and knew nothing like that would kill them in the end. They just hoped the fight would not last until sunrise.

"Gunn! Watch out!" Angel cried in alarm. Spike, also seeing what was about to happen, ran to the only human in the group, pushing him out of the way of the demon wielding the really sharp sword that impaled him in the stomach instead. Gunn crawled to the fence, holding his stomach in pain.

"Not much longer," he told himself. "but I'll be damned if I don't kill at least two more of these nasties."

Forcing himself to stand, he ran back into the fight, screaming his war cry and hitting one demon square in the middle of the head. He watched with pleasure as it fell to the ground, and died miserably. He ran for another, decapitating it as well, but was thrown backwards by another demon as if he was nothing more than a child's toy he was tossing aside. And Gunn knew he was not getting up this time. He clutched his stomach, squeezing his eyes shut, hoping beyond hope that Angel, Spike, and Illyria would be able to win this war.

Angel was the first to notice Gunn slumped against the fence, his breath slowing down each time. He could see he was about to lose another friend, someone he'd asked to be a part of this war, and ran over uncaring of the battle going on at the moment.

"Angel, get your ass back in there," Gunn said with shallowed and struggled breaths. "You got a fight to win…and you shouldn't let some punk like me hold you back from that."

"Gunn, I…," Angel began. He struggled to keep reign over his emotions, knowing he was going to need every ounce of strength to kill the rest of those bastards. "Thanks for keeping with the mission, bro."

Gunn smiled at Angel's use of his lingo. "I always knew I'd go out trying to save all your guys asses. Peace out, and may the force be with you," he said with a laugh.

I saw Angel. I watched him sigh heavily, struggling to find a way to cope with the loss of two friends in one night. He knew there would be casualties. He knew he would have to cope. He also believed no one was going to come out of this alive. But now he knew survival was the one thing he wanted to fight for now.

Spike took one quick glance backwards and saw Gunn take his last breaths. He turned and growled at the demon pestering him at the moment, ripping his head off with his bare hands.

Illyria knew the moment Gunn was gone. She felt it. She was mad. And when she saw several more demons get thrown backwards, she smiled. She smiled the smile of intense anger, before punching a demon through the chest and ripping out its heart.

"This. This is how Wesley's death made me feel. And this is how Gunn's death has effected the dark-haired half breed."

I watch Angel and Spike fight, growing weary after almost two hours of fighting. Angel was fighting for those he lost, and those he wanted to save.

"Angel, when my time comes, I want you to know this. Even though you're an enormous poofter and I still hate you, I wanted you to know that it felt good to be a part of saving the world once more," Spike told Angel as they began fighting back to back.

"Spike, as much as I hate you too, you're not going to die. I'll be damned if I lose one more member of this team. I'm finished screwing around. It's time to end this."

Spike was silent after that. I could see that he liked the feeling of being accepted. Maybe it was because he was once again fighting and killing with Angel, only on the side of good this time.

Regardless of the energy that seemed to keep leaving them, they consistently managed to maim each demon.

Even though Illyria, by this point, had shed the blood of many demons now, she only seemed to grow angrier, feeling a sense of dissatisfaction. She was confused about this because bloodshed has caused much happiness for her in the past. I think she feared these emotions were just growing stronger in her. She felt sadness, an emotion so unusual to her after Wesley died, and now she felt herself becoming infected.

I watched her tilt her head at the demon she had held by the throat, and I cheered. She was clearly upset and angry, and the only way to make this stop, to regain her sense of satisfaction, was to kill every single beast in her way. She was killing them for Wesley, and for Gunn.

I begged for her to just do it now. I know she couldn't hear me, but she started in. She popped the head off the present demon before storming angrily towards the rest, tears beginning to run down her cheeks. She didn't know they were there. She was too focused on dealing with the matter at hand.

She seemed to gain even more energy, and it appeared as though she grew stronger at that point. She punched through the chests of two more demons, ripping their hearts out. I think this was cathartic for her, making them know how it felt to have their hearts ripped out. She simultaneously punched heads, making them explode the same way she had ended Vail's pathetic existence and ripped body parts and internal organs from others. She did not keep track of how many she had killed or how many were even left, she just let loose on all of them.

I looked over to Angel and Spike to check on their progress, and watched them neatly and consecutively cut each demon in front of them in half. I cheered for them, glad they were still in the fight. I imagine though that if they had stopped to rest, Illyria would have eventually managed to take care of them all, because when I turned my attention back to her, she had managed to go through the majority of the demons around her.

Angel and Spike wiped their hands, having finished off the demons surrounding them, and were about to help Illyria, when that stupid dragon came out of nowhere, blowing a flame right in front of Spike.

"Bloody hell!" he cried, jumping backwards.

"I am KILLING that dragon, now," Angel said, his voice full of sheer determination.

He barely missed getting hit with another flame coming from the dragon's mouth.

Spike watched, letting Angel take care of this himself. He looked over at Illyria and smirked when he saw all the demon body parts littering the area around her. He moved when more demons began coming his way, killing them instantly because he seemed to enjoy watching Illyria make a mess with their internal organs.

I was jolted when I heard a screech, and thought something horrible had happened to Angel. Instead, he stood over the corpse of the dragon, a large smile covering his face.

"That's my vampire!" I yelled in a cheer, wishing Angel could know I was looking on.

"Looks like Old Blue's got everything under control over there," Spike pointed out with a smirk playing on his lips.

Angel ran to take care of half the demons, while Spike covered Angel's back once again. It took them an hour to finish them off, but they did it. Illyria was down to four demons. And she was getting tired. She managed to snap the neck of one demon, steal his weapon and kill another. She thrust a sword through another demon's neck. And then there was one.

Illyria threw it against the wall, and began beating it mercilessly. I know she knew the second that demon was dead, but she couldn't stop hitting it. She could feel the tears now, and no matter how many times she hit it, the sadness would not go away. It did not bring Wesley back. It didn't bring Gunn back. And still, she was dissatisfied. Her power punches soon turned into weakened hits on the chest of the demon she was now on top of.

"Illyria," Angel called out. "It's over."

Illyria stopped her tirade, and stood up. "How is it over? I do not understand."

"We killed all the demons," he said bluntly.

"How is it that I am still not satisfied?"

"What do you mean, pet?"

She began walking towards Gunn's corpse. "He has died. Wesley died as well. I felt that bloodshed would make this…feeling of pain go away, but nothing I did helped. I don't understand."

"You weren't able to bring Wesley or Gunn back by pummeling those demons," Spike said above a whisper.

"How does one go on when they continually feel the pain of someone's death?"

"You just do," Angel said simply. "Time heals all wounds."

"But Wesley will never return. I know nothing will work, but it seems that fighting for someone would have made the pain lessen."

Angel looked down at Gunn. "Yeah. That's a lesson we all have to deal with."

"But how does one deal?"

Spike sighed. "By taking it one day at a time."

"We better get going," Angel said. "The sun will rise in a few hours, and we need a place to go for now."

Before heading off, Angel knelt down in front of his dead friend.

"Rest in peace, Gunn. You are a true hero."

Getting up, Angel, Spike, and Illyria walked away from the mess of demons, looking back at Gunn once more.

I cried. I cried for their pain, and the days of struggle ahead for them.

Angel would feel the loss and tell himself he failed everyone. Spike would be unsure of what to do in the time. Illyria would struggle with having to learn with the new emotions she'd never experienced before.

"We sure beat their asses, didn't we Cordy?" Gunn said, smiling from ear to ear.

"We sure did," I told him.

"I wonder what they will do now," Wesley said, concern etching his face.

I shrugged. "Just live from day to day, I guess."

"Till the end," they both replied, watching their badly beaten friends walk away.


End file.
